I write this blog after being well for nearly 7 months. This is the longest period of wellness that I have had for years (maybe even since my diagnosis) and gives me real hope for the future. Just 9 months ago I was nearing the end of an awful year as far as my bipolar goes and I was not sure how much more I could take. I had lost hope.
Over the last 7 months I have thankfully found that hope again, it hasn’t been easy and I have had to make some difficult decisions, changed things in my life, have had hard conversations with myself but the hope has returned and that is just the best feeling!
Life isn’t really easy and carefree but it is good, fulfilling and I am very happy. I do have to give myself a reality check often (sometimes daily) to monitor how tired I am, how much sleep I am getting, whether something I want to do might not be the best idea. I have to avoid things because they might lead to increased anxiety which in turn might trigger an episode and some days I am definitely still walking on egg shells. But having said all that, the hope I longed for at the end of last year has returned with the help of my family, friends and for the first time some superb mental health care.
After a turbulent few days as a citizen of this country I wish the hope that I have found for myself could somehow be transferred into the lives of everyone in the UK. Let us celebrate the fact we are so fortunate to live in a democracy and remember those with no hope and no chance of ever having a vote or having their voice heard. Let us unite in hope and try and bring some peace, compassion and love into the most difficult of situations. Let us celebrate our differences and not let politics divide us.
None of us know what the future holds in this great country just like I don’t know what the future holds for me and bipolar. What I do know is that hope can return and change situations for the better and for the moment that is what I am holding on to.